Kibbud Av Ve'Eim Archives | Rosh Yeshiva Responds

1 03, 2026

Contacting non Shabbat-observant people in a different time zone when it’s Shabbat for them, but not for you

March 1st, 2026|Family, Kibbud Av Ve'Eim, Orach Chayim, Prohibitions, Shabbat, Technology|

QUESTION

Is it permissible to have a phone call with someone non-observant in a time zone where it is currently Shabbat for them? I am assuming there is no particular need beyond the relationship. Does it make a difference if it is
a) a close relative/parent
b) if they call you rather than you calling them
c) if there is a need, but not a life-threatening need?

ANSWER

No, one may not have such a phone call.

There is a concept in the Gemara of מסייע בידי עוברי עבירה (mesaye’a bidei ovrei aveirah – assisting transgressors) which is distinct from the issur of לפני עוור (lifnei iver

1 08, 2024

May a Child Financially Support Their Parent from Ma’aser?

August 1st, 2024|Family, Kibbud Av Ve'Eim, Tzedakah & Social Justice, Yoreh De'ah|

QUESTION

New York, NY

What are your thoughts on a teenager earning money and using ma’aser to support a financially struggling parent (while the teenager is still a dependent of that parent)? Is there already an obligation on the child under kibbud av va’em (honoring parents) to support the financially struggling parent? If that’s the case, does that mean that ma’aser cannot be used, or is there a reason to allow it?

ANSWER

The short answer is yes.

Buying A Non-Kosher Gift Card for a Non-Religious Parent

21 05, 2023

Buying A Non-Kosher Gift Card for a Non-Religious Parent

May 21st, 2023|Kibbud Av Ve'Eim, Yoreh De'ah|

https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Amazon_Gift_Cards.jpg

QUESTION

Detroit, Michigan

A ba’al teshuva’s father has asked for a gift card to a non-kosher restaurant for a Father’s Day present so that he can enjoy a nice meal out. The father is not interested in a kosher restaurant (and would likely be somewhat disappointed to receive one).

Is it permissible to buy a gift card for a non-kosher restaurant if the restaurant also has drinks and possibly less problematic food such as green salads? Can the son or daughter rely on a false assumption that the father might just get

1 02, 2018

Honoring an Abusive Parent?

February 1st, 2018|Aveilut, Kibbud Av Ve'Eim, Yoreh De'ah|

Must a Person Honor and Mourn for an Abusive Parent?

The short answer is “no.” One of the core principles in halakha when it comes to our obligation to others is hayekha kodmin, meaning our first ethical obligation is to ourselves. One must prioritize her own physical, emotional and psychological health, even if this means that kibbud av v’em must be set aside.

Let’s explore this in more detail.

Honoring one’s parents is a mitzvah that can demand a great deal from us. This is particularly true for the sandwich generation, adults who have responsibilities to their spouses and children, and yet who

Saying Kaddish for a non-Jewish Parent

25 01, 2018

Saying Kaddish for a non-Jewish Parent

January 25th, 2018|Aveilut, Kaddish, Kibbud Av Ve'Eim, Lifecycles, Non-Jews and Other Religions, Tefillah, Yoreh De'ah|

May a Jew by choice sit shivah and say kaddish for their non-Jewish parent?

To answer this question we must address two issues: (1) What is halakhah’s view of the parent-child relationship in these cases? The gemara states, “A person who converts is like a newborn infant,” (Yevamot 22a). In other words, a convert is unrelated halakhically to his biological father and mother. Should we read this statement in absolute terms or is halakhah cognizant of the biological and emotional bonds between parent and child regardless of legal definitions? (2) Do our halakhic and religious obligations direct us to mourn the

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